Hai am Legend

Just woke up and thought to myself

2011-05-02T11:46:00.001-07:00

"Damn, highschool was like 5 years ago. Some people change, some stay the same, got myself some good friends, younger cousins growing up and siblings almost done with school. I'm especially excited for me, I'll be saving lives by next year."

Can't wait till my parents can kick their feet up and relax, phamily BBQs are gonna be bomb in the future!

It's not your typical post but I just had a moment for life right now, and I HAD to share the positivity lol time to go eat my cereal.

Fighting The Good Fight

2011-04-23T13:59:00.000-07:00

My parents have always told me that I had a lot of potential but potential for what?

What does potential mean if you have nothing to apply it to?

Don't get me wrong, I enjoy very many things.

I might even take it a step further and say that I'm actually pretty good at many things but what's talent if you got no passion?

Just a bunch of hobbies to pass time by till I'm six feet under, I guess.

I'm assuming most people find happiness by pursuing something they're passionate about. I don't really have any real dreams to chase; only nightmares to run from. Most of the time the glass is "half empty" rather than "half full" in my world.

I've been dealing with depression and anxiety ever since my brother died when I was 15,

but for the past 3 years, I had contentment down pretty well.

Life was pretty good for awhile but now these dark feelings are creeping up again.

I started waking up with my heart palpitating even before a thought process even starts.

The anxiety starts making me feel uncomfortable and scared.

The way I feel starts governing the way I think,

and the way I think controls what I feel; forcing me into a downwards spiral of negativity.

I could be enjoying myself and out of no where my heart decides it wants to be a little bitch and I have to stop what I'm doing to tend to it by slowly breathing in and out.

I even considered taking meds for my problems but I want to feel good to actually be me.

I want to prove to myself that my existence is valid without the use of medicine.

"You think therefore you are," and if drugs and meds control the way you think and feel; do you actually exist?

My heart finally calmed down.

It's definitely an uphill battle but I know I'll get to the top.

Holy fuck, it's really 2011

2011-04-22T20:30:00.000-07:00

You know, I actually forgot that I had a blogspot. I started this back in 2008, god damn! The shit I posted back then was pretty lame but whatever. Yes the picture of me is when I was 20, so are the interest and music. I decided to leave it there just to remember who I was when I started this blog.

I initially started one up because I was bored and wanted to practice logging in my thoughts but I got caught up in not having any real thoughts because I've wasted it on hours of bullshitting on Facebook.

WHAT THE FUCK DO I EVEN DO ON FACEBOOK?
There's really no real conversations that take place, just a bunch of one liners.
No one gives a shit about what you say unless it appeals to the large mass of idiots on Facebook.

I bet you're thinking,

"Wait Hai, if you're trying to appeal to the large mass of idiots on Facebook, then doesn't that make you an idiot?"

Good question reader, I am part of the large mass of idiots but I want to be seen as an individual idiot now. Well, cheers to the revival of my blogspot and hopefully I'll have some real shit to say, if not I'll go back to bullshitting and most of the time, I really have nothing to say... so cheers to Facebook also heheh.

HOLIDAY MEAL

2008-12-27T14:36:00.001-08:00

So I just ate an incredible Yuletide supper.

Hamburger Steak Meal.

I couldn't find any type of bread to eat it like a sandwich, so I had to be creative.

I defrosted a ground beef patty and mixed in some garlic salt, parmesan cheese, basil, cheddar cheese and slapped it in between the george foreman grill.

*Daggg, I just googled Hamburger steak and turns out its a salisbury steak.
Shitt, and here I just thought I came up with a great idea. I didn't even know that's what salisbury steak was.*

Anyway...
Well... I ate it with A1 sauce, and it was good.
The oven baked tater tots went well with it.

I now know how Macaulay Culkin felt in HOME ALONE 2 when he eats dinner by himself during Christmas time, except I'm not some crafty little kid that my family forgot about. Just a stupid kid that his family forgot about.

Next time I'll teach you how to cut up chicken nuggets and toss them in with some lettuce to make a kickass salad.

Actually thats all you gotta do, so... yeah. Try it out and think of me when youre eating it.

Happy Fucking Holidays people.

Lazy

2008-07-23T06:09:00.001-07:00

Sooooo uhhhh....

I'm way too lazy to do this.

VLOGS

2008-05-15T06:48:00.001-07:00

I'm thinking about starting video blogs while I'm on vacation in Australia and Vietnam. It's just an idea I haven't got the slightest clue on how I would do that because I don't have a camcorder. I just think it would be cool to have some interesting backgrounds while I'm making a vlog, like a waterfall or something like that, kangaroos? The only people who I've even told about my blogs are Tiff and Jeannie and I don't even think they look at it. SO WHO AM I TALKING TOO? Anyway here's some pictures of Vietnam and Australia.

Lost

2008-04-29T21:12:00.000-07:00

I lost my keys again. The retarded thing about it is that I got a replacement key about 4 days ago. I had to go take the bus to school again and I had to break into my house because I lost my set of house keys. If I'm this forgetful now then I can't imagine how I'd be when I'm older. I always seem to loose the little things that should stay in my pocket. I've lost my phone so many times, luckily it rings and vibrates so I can locate it. I've replaced my debit card twice, replaced a drivers license and I've probably lost a lot of little dollar bills i keep in my pockets. Another thing that gets missing all the time is my socks and t-shirts. I'm like "what the fuck?" because I don't take them anywhere, it's not like i take off my clothes and leave them around randomly. I just leave it in a corner till it needs to be washed and put it back in the basket. I don't if it's me or someone is messing with me but I'm tired of losing things, I should buy myself a tracking device.

She's alright.

2008-04-23T02:07:00.000-07:00

Jeannie
CHAN
THAN
A
SINH

EVERYBODY
SAY IT
ROCK IT
DON'T
STOP IT

You and Me...

2008-04-10T22:03:00.000-07:00

Need to make a baby

I just woke up from a four hour nap.

2008-04-04T21:04:00.000-07:00

I'm not sure what to write about again, finding topics are really hard. I was planing on writing one post everyday but I already missed my April third post. Four hours of day napping? I'm gonna be up late again which means waking up early for work is gonna be hard.

Adulthood

2008-04-02T18:16:00.000-07:00

I'm coming to realize that I'm becoming an adult. It's not because I recently turned 20 or that more responsibilities are being handed to me. The reason why I believe I'm heading into adulthood is that I just started to noticed the blubber developing around my waist. Body fat was unheard of throughout my high school years. I had read about it in books but I just thought it was something that happened to other people, guess I was wrong. I'm not ready for this... body fat. I hate the idea that I have to work to keep this fat off of my body, it should just come naturally. Maybe it does come naturally and that it's my unnatural eating habits turning me into a lard factory. Maybe I should put off eating fast food and go for a healthier alternative but that's going to be hard because enjoying food is about the only thing that makes me happy lately and I'm pretty content with my life right now.

First Official Post.

2008-04-01T21:53:00.000-07:00

Hmm... I'm not too sure what to write about, so I guess I'll write about having a blog to get me started. About two weeks ago, I was inspired by my friend Tiff to create a blog. I have no idea why I was so intrigued by it. It seemed like she wrote about nothing but it was interesting for some mysterious reason. I guess her blogs are similar to how Seinfeld was a show about nothing and Seinfeld has achieved legendary status as a sitcom. Another reason why I think blogs are kinda cool is because it's preserving your thoughts at that moment so that you can see how you develop over time. I don't think I'll get many subscribers but this blog is mainly for me. It's a good time of my life to start a blog too because I just recently turned 20.

Check - 1... 2...

2008-03-21T17:38:00.000-07:00

Just testing out the new blog.